Want to Adopt from China? Thin bodies make good parents: Kimberly Tsao
Thin bodies make good parents
It’s Down to This
By: Kimberly Tsao
Posted: 5/6/09
“Child seeks married parents, under 50, skinny and pretty. No antidepressant medicine for the last two years. Must meet economic and educational standards.”
China has enforced stricter adoption laws since May 2007, according to a Time magazine article. In the past, I have kept my mouth shut about China.
Everyone else has been giving the country so much flack for its environmental sins, censorship rules, human rights violations and toys - but China’s new restrictions on adoption have forced me to join the club.
At one adoption center, the number of adoptees plummeted from 7,906 in 2005 to 3,909 in 2008, according to the same article. Another orphanage’s numbers plunged from 1,152 in 2005 to 422 in 2008.
Cory Barron, foundation director of Children’s Hope International, said, “These are China’s children, and they can set the requirement to what they deem is best.”
Try again.
“I think they are saying, ‘You know what? We have fewer children now and so we are looking for better parents,’” said Josh Zhong, founder and director of Colorado’s Chinese Children Adoption International.
Since most Chinese couples preferred baby boys to girls, the country is currently facing an overwhelming men-to-women ratio. Time magazine reported that the shift in China’s perception of daughters has resulted in fewer orphans, so the country can afford to be more selective.
Last I checked, after taking one step forward, it isn’t mandatory to take two steps back. Adopters can’t be obese or have facial deformities, which is beyond ridiculous. People’s faces and weights do not determine whether they’re going to be good parents or not.
Society has been sending girls the message that they have to be gorgeous and a size -2 to be successful, whether it’s in modeling, relationships or life. Now, China is telling them that they must be physically appealing to be first-rate parents?
Perhaps China doesn’t want obese, depressed or old parents because they could die early, leaving the children orphaned again. However, I know people who have developed healthy habits once they’ve had children.
My uncle has been taking vitamin supplements for his liver because he doesn’t want to leave his sons alone - his father died of liver cancer when he was young.
Similarly, obese and depressed parents may start taking care of themselves once China guarantees them a child. Before having a child, they probably had no reason to eat better. Now, they’ll have no better reason.
Moreover, adoption grants infertile people the chance to start a family. Some of them just happen to be over 50.
Whether it’s because they waited too long to find their soul mates or to do everything on their lists - you know, the one with all their hopes and dreams - that’s not the point. No one should be deprived of having a family.
If China thinks people’s marital statuses limit their family dysfunction, they have another thing coming. Some people can offer better homes divorced than they can married.
Poor, uneducated people don’t necessarily make bad parents. Bad people make bad parents, and the poor and the uneducated aren’t bad people. Being a good parent is dependent on a lot of things, but I’d say that China’s latest restrictions are the exception.
Fear not. It’s not all bad. More wannabe parents are considering adopting a child with a disability, which carries a shorter wait, according to the article.
While it’s great that children with disabilities are finding homes, it feels like China has its priorities mixed up. The country should enforce stricter requirements for adopters of disabled children, not put them on the speed track to parenthood.
These children don’t require just any care, they require specific care. Haven’t you heard? They can’t get that if their parents aren’t skinny.
I couldn’t imagine my aunt, who had two miscarriages, not being able to adopt from China, if that’s what she wanted.
I couldn’t imagine my siblings, who claim they will forego labor pains, not being able to adopt from China if that’s their place of choice.
I certainly couldn’t imagine celebrities, such as Meg Ryan, not being able to adopt from China if that’s their fate.
In an InStyle magazine article, Ryan said of her adopted Chinese daughter, Daisy, “I feel like we made some agreement, long ago and far away, to meet in the way we did.”
